This lesson is pretty heavily reliant on role playing and discussions, so I know I'm going to have to come up with something else to fill the time. I have never once had a group that would go for role playing, and I currently have one Laurel, so that's not going to go over well.
As luck or Providence would have it, I was just listening to an old episode of the excellent Mormon Stories podcast that was a conversation with Gregory Prince, the author of David O. McKay and the Rise of Modern Mormonism.
I have heard this quote from the lesson:
President David O. McKay explained: “Next to the bestowal of life itself, the right to direct that life is God’s greatest gift to man. … Freedom of choice is more to be treasured than any possession earth can give”a million times, but listening to that podcast gave it a really interesting context for me. This was a belief held very close to the heart for President McKay, so much so that he fought for the right for people to disagree with him. When other leaders wanted to excommunicate author Juanita Brooks for her book on the Mountain Meadows Massacre, he personally stepped in and stopped it. He allowed people he disagreed with on both ends of the spectrum to make the choices they believed in and he refused to compel them to "get in line." My jaw just gapes at the thought of how much humility he must have had. As the Prophet, when everyone is looking to you for a definitive answer, to still acknowledge that someone else may be right and they have to follow their own conscience...I'm just so inspired by him.
Personally, I think the girls get plenty of "be good" lessons. I want to use this opportunity to discuss how to be more Christlike and follow the example of President McKay. I want to talk about how we can have more respect for the agency of others.
This was something my last, much admired, bishop used to talk about in every ward council meeting. How in all our missionary efforts, we had to respect the agency of others. No fear, no manipulation, only love and truth. I think it's something that is just so pertinent to these teenagers as they watch their peers take one of an endless number of divergent paths and have to choose how to handle that. If a friend starts drinking, do they have to stop being their friend? What if a parent starts doing something the teen knows is wrong? What if the parent is just doing something the teen wishes they wouldn't - like get a divorce? How do you respect someone's agency when it affects you?
I found this talk given by Elder Merrill Oaks, formerly of the 70, given at a conference at BYU. It's given for parents, but I think there's a lot of valuable insight in here, particularly in some of the stories he uses from the scriptures.
This talk by Elder Douglas L. Callister has a brief section on agency I really liked. I love that sentence about "divine hesitancy."
This "Questions and Answers" column from the Ensign has some good ideas about respecting the agency of someone close to you.
If I can just point out one bit of subtext to be careful to avoid, it's the thought, present in the lesson as well as the passage from True to the Faith, and in the Resource Materials, that the consequences of using your agency wisely are happiness and blessings. This is a prime example of how we all somehow adopt the thought that if trial or calamity befall us, it's because we're not righteous enough. Read the lesson again with that thought in mind. This is how the confusion happens.
Yes, using our agency righteously will bring us peace. And it can bring us the type of happiness that comes from being proud of ourselves, having good relationships, or a clear conscience. But I don't think we can afford to be vague or generalize the blessings we receive from righteousness. Those blessings are blessings of the Spirit and eternal life. That's all we're promised. Other things are blessings, and those things might come, but healthy children and a well paying job are not consequences for any kind of righteous behavior, and I think we need to be clear about that.
Agency is something that my Laurel dd and I are having "fun" with at the moment - she feels that if she chooses the "right" choice it is because she was co-erced or forced into it by her mother or leaders etc. Its an on-going struggle, and I know that the sister who teaches the lessons, while sweet and all that, will never be able to see what dd needs - it will be just another "from the book, teach the idea" lesson (sigh)
ReplyDeleteJust got called to Laurel advisor and just found your site. I'm so glad to have found it. This was my exact idea as I was reading this lesson... and I have to say, I completely agree with the "where do these stories come from?" post. I never use those stories and am glad to hear I'm not the only one.
ReplyDeleteI know that we need to teach to the ideal, but there is a world out there that doesn't always fit into the ideal (I know this for sure personally!) and life happens in ways that can be shocking when you think that if you just follow the "be good" lessons everything turns out roses.
Again, thanks!
Just received a calling as YW Secretary, and I was asked to help give lessons. Just found your blog, and I must say thank you. I know it will help a lot when giving the lesson on Agency this Sunday.
ReplyDeleteThanks!!
On the topic of "There's a right way to live and be happy," (my personal pet peeve in the Children's Songbook), there is an excellent quote by Elder Christofferson in a talk "Moral Agency."
ReplyDelete"Joseph Smith was told to expect some severe opposition despite making good choices. Said the Lord, “Know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good” (D&C 122:7). We are in a mortal experience because we cannot become as God without that experience. We must prove to Him and to ourselves that we can consistently make the right choices and then stick to those choices, come what may.
Some think that they should be spared from any adversity if they keep God’s commandments, but it is “in the furnace of affliction” (Isaiah 48:10; 1 Nephi 20:10) that we are chosen. The Lord’s promise is not to spare us the conflict but to preserve and console us in our afflictions and to consecrate them for our gain (see 2 Nephi 2:2; 4:19–26; Jacob 3:1).”